Look! ^^^ I made a thing! (I'm so proud of myself i'm practically bursting with happiness.) I think it sums up the past few weeks pretty accurately.
I've been contemplating the meaning of friendship recently. How great it is, but also how... strange. You meet someone, decide you like said person and voila, you become friends. I can't actually remember how some of my friends and I actually forged our relationships. They just.. happened. I remember when I left University, I was worried about how I was going to make new friends, because how do you do that?? I had figured out at the grand old age of twenty one that unfortunately life was not like the TV shows I so desperately loved watching. That no matter however many times I re watched my dvd boxset of F.R.I.E.N.D.S. I was not going to be transported into Central Perk to hang out with the gang and be happy forever. Life is just not that shiny and perfect.
And honestly, I always used to feel pretty insecure about the state of my friendships. I
would worry that I didn't have enough friends, that people didn't like
me because I wasn't pretty enough, or opinionated, or because I didn't
conform to their lifestyle 'norm'. I've never really had a best friend, a bff, finish each other sentences type of friend.
I've had friends who at certain times i've been super close too, but
people move on, grow up, drift apart. And i've come to realise (after a
lot of tears. I was a tragic teenager) that that is ok. Because, get this, the friends that I do have.. are prettyyy cool.
Here's the thing. After years of thought and searching, i'm a firm believer in having a few choice, supportive friends over a bunch of people who you never really connect with. It's a philosophy that works well for me. Mostly because large crowds make me uncomfortable. Also, because well, i'm kinda socially awkward. I'm the person who likes to spend all their evenings in their pyjamas, eating ice cream and watching TV. I have an utter lack of desire to do anything at all social after i've taken my bra off for the day. You want to go out out, like clubbing? I'm so not your girl. Want to have a pyjama party with a mountain of food? Look no further.
And luckily for my sanity i've found some great friends amidst the chaos and stresses of life. Friends who share my love of reading, Harry Potter, food and naps. Friends who laugh at my sometimes inappropriate sense of humour and share my standards. Friends who accept me for who I am, social awkwardness and all.
And friendship doesn't have to be some great big, grand expression of love and happiness all the time! Friendship to me is all about the little things, the late night whispered phonecalls and laughing fits, the shared memories of 2 for 1 Slug and Lettuce Mondays and appreciation of Caramel Nibbles and Appletiser. Friendship is about knowing you're not alone but being able to be your own person at the same time. Friendship is a million little things:
Friendship is staying up and talking until 5am.
Friendship is traipsing through fields, having serious life chats amongst the hoards of people and running hand in hand through the crowds at the Bristol Balloon Fiesta together.
Friendship is getting up at 4am to watch the early morning balloon assent at the Bristol Balloon Fiesta with me.
Friendship is pushing and shoving your way past each other in the dessert line at a wedding. Those doughnuts are mine!
Friendship is laughing together at inappropriate jokes in the back row of Church.
Friendship is whatsapping sneaky pictures of hot guys to cheer the other person up.
Friendship is watching films in your pyjamas, eating domino's and gossipping. (Friendship is ordering domino's because your hungry and not minding that the others can't contribute to the cost.)
Friendship is lending out your Netflix login details to the lame person who doesn't have it.
Friendship is sending postcards back and forth even with much speedier and easier methods of communication available, just because it's nice to receive pretty post.
Friendship is traipsing around countless charity shops with me whilst I try to find an outfit for that 1920s costume party or yet another floral skirt.
Friendship is hanging out on a Sunday afternoon, eating good food and talking.
Friendship is having deep and meaningful discussions in the car, even when we're parked outside the house.
Friendship is homemade Cd's and discovering new bands together.
Friendship is getting lost literally everytime we travel to Wales together.
Friendship is making up stories of Russian Spies wearing woolly hats and laughing uncontrollably on a park bench in London.
Friendship is baking a cake for someone. Just because.
Friendship is pushing back all the furniture and having a dance party in the living room.
Friendship is meeting up and then just taking a collective nap.
Friendship is watching dvds and crafting together. Even when it's sunny outside. Because it's ok to be lazy sometimes.
Friendship is dancing in the rain together.
Friendship is having friends who just get you so much that they're more like sisters than friends.
I have the best friends! Here is to a million more happy little things!
Catherine
